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This is me, but I don't know this person anymore.

This is the last time I was healthy. I've forgotten what that feels like.

The story goes like this:

• Digestive tract shuts down days after running half marathon. Eating nearly impossible. Weight falls off.
• Mayo Clinic offers hope and a feeding tube and not much more.
• Four year odyssey of doctors visits, diets, and natural remedies ensues. Improvement, but no cure.
• No doctor is able to to turn my digestion back on. Weight continues to fall off. I feel sick every day.
• Life changes dramatically.
• Chronic Lyme Disease diagnosis in 2013. Seems like the beginning of the end of illness.
• Lyme treatment begins. Makes me more sick. I tolerate none of the medications. We try everything.

This is where my blog begins. I've been sick nearly six years. It was Chronic Lyme Disease all along, but I never knew.

I've spent four years fighting a shadow. And two fighting an identifiable enemy. I expected better results when the shadows fell away, but they were not to be had. At least not yet. 

My body and mind are tired. So tired. But I will not give up. I will never stop trying.

The purpose of this blog is to document my struggle in the event it might help somebody else.

The other purpose of this blog is to give me purpose. Because I've lost it. I've become a professional sick person, and I want a new job. I can't do many of the things I used to. Some days I can't even get out of my chair, or out of my pajamas. But I can do this. I can write. I can share my experience, and I can try to do my part to raise awareness of chronic lyme disease so that one day we may all run again.

And one day we may all remember what it feels like to be healthy.